It needs precise control in both flow and force. Using waterbending for healing is incredible. Still sexist as hell, and it seems like a really dumb move to cut your military force in half on gender-basis in a war for your survival - especially when your enemy already has a numbers advantage, and you have both an elemental and a terrain advantage to help protect your people - but it does make a certain amount of prepare-for-the-worst type sense.
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The idea would probably have been along the lines of "Women not trained to fight will be less likely to try fighting / more likely to run or hide from Fire Nation invaders and, if we keep the Fire Nation under the impression that we have no female waterbenders - or, at least, that the ones we do have are complete noncombatants - they will be less likely to target our women looking for waterbenders, have much more difficulty identifying them if they do go looking, and be much less likely to entirely eradicate free Northern waterbending like they did / are doing in the South." The Northerners would obviously have heard tell of how the Fire Nation was capturing and executing virtually all of the Southern Tribe's waterbenders, so they may have started restricting their own female waterbenders to healing roles in effort to reduce their active involvement in resistance against, visibility to, and/or perception as a threat by the Fire Nation when they inevitably came knocking. My take on it is that it could have been a more recent (as in a decades-old rather than centuries-old) cultural measure taken up in response to Fire Nation expansionism a way to keep their women out of direct combat roles against the Fire Nation war machine, and/or to keep the Fire Nation inquisition off their women's trails.
Kanna (Gran Gran) specifically left the water tribe because of its chauvinistic traditions.
The second version of this story is his personal grudge with Katara for his sexual frustration towards Gran Gran. Pakku merely used an already patriarchal system to support his arguments and his beliefs. While on the other side Sokka who is constantly sexist is exposed to ridicule when contested. We also see this paradigm break with Suki (influenced by a female avatar), Ty Lee, Asula, Mai et al. That was the point of the show, to criticize gender-roles, and not to justify them. That's the take away throughout book 1 and 2. And yet tradition kept old gender-roles as a conservative fallacy. Men could chose to be healers and women to be warriors.
There should be no reason for there to be ascribed gender-roles at that point. The Northern Water Tribe is a complex society with complex internal politics and economics from what it was shown. Even in wallstreet for example where during the 2008 financial crisis firms with female CEOs were shown to have better decision making and better outcome. Take Israeli army for example, or the Kurdish YPJ. After society takes a complex structure gender roles basically disappear.
That's true, gender-roles can indeed be understood, but are only valid in primitive societies.
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